Why Can’t I Stop Drinking After Work?
- Jul 13
- 4 min read
Updated: Sep 3
You wake up feeling flat. Foggy. A bit ashamed.
You tell yourself tonight will be different. You won’t have a drink tonight. You’ll get through the day, go home, and do something else - anything else.
But somewhere around 3pm, the resolve starts to slip.
You feel a bit better. You start justifying it - It wasn’t that bad, I deserve it, Just one.
By the time you’re on the way home, you’re already planning the pour.
Sound familiar?
You're Not Alone in This Loop
We hear versions of this story every day. High-performing people, managing work, life, families - and drinking every night even when they don’t really want to.
It doesn’t look like a crisis.
You show up to work. You meet deadlines. You’re holding everything together. From the outside, no one would guess you’re quietly stuck.
But inside, it feels like a loop you can’t break.
One of our clients put it perfectly:
“I felt like I was on a hamster wheel I couldn’t get off. Every morning I’d promise myself I wouldn’t drink. Every night I’d cave. And then I’d wake up and start again - tired, guilty, and frustrated with myself- wondering why I was pretty disciplined in every area of my life, except this one.”
So Why Is After-Work Drinking So Hard to Stop?
Because it doesn’t just look like a reward - it feels like one.
When you’ve had a full-on day, your nervous system is still wound up. Alcohol offers a shortcut to the “off switch.” It signals the day is done. That you're allowed to rest now. That you've earned something.
And let’s be honest - most people don’t stop to reflect on why they’re drinking. They just feel better once they do.
“It’s Just a Habit”… or Is It?
A lot of people write it off as a harmless routine. A glass of wine while cooking. A beer after logging off. Something to take the edge off.
But what if that “habit” has become something more?
If you’re drinking most weeknights…
If it feels hard to skip a day…
If you tell yourself “not tonight” and still pour the drink…
It’s not just a habit. It’s a pattern with emotional, neurological and possibly physical roots.
What Happens to Your Brain and Body
Here’s what’s going on behind the scenes:
Dopamine conditioning: Alcohol gives a quick hit of feel-good chemicals. Over time, your brain starts expecting that hit after stress or effort.
Stress response wiring: Drinking lowers cortisol - temporarily. But long-term, it actually raises baseline stress, making the cycle worse.
Sleep disruption: Alcohol interrupts REM sleep, leaving you groggy and irritable the next day - which makes the next drink even more appealing.
Physical dependency: Even if you’re not shaking or sweating, your body may be adapting to expect alcohol daily - and that makes skipping it feel uncomfortable.
This isn’t just about willpower.
It’s biology. And once you understand that, you stop blaming yourself - and start making real change.
“But I Still Get Everything Done…”
Yes - and that’s part of the trap.
When you’re still functioning at a high level, it’s easy to believe the drinking isn’t really a problem. You’re going to work. You’re handling responsibilities. You’re not blacking out or making a mess.
But daily drinking does more than just dull your edge - it:
Lowers your focus and memory
Increases anxiety (especially in the mornings)
Reduces sleep quality, even if you fall asleep quickly
Disrupts hormones and energy regulation
Slowly chips away at motivation and self-trust
You might still be showing up. But how much more present, sharp, and grounded would you be without the constant cycle?
How Much Is Too Much?
There’s no perfect number - but here’s what to watch for:
You drink more nights than you don’t
You find it hard to stop once you start
You use work stress as a reason (or excuse) to drink
You’ve promised yourself “not tonight” - and still poured
You wake up regretting the night before
You’re drinking alone more often than socially
You feel anxious, low or foggy most mornings
You don’t need to hit a rock bottom.
Not liking how this feels - that’s reason enough.
So What Can You Do?
Change doesn’t mean flipping your life upside down.
It means interrupting the loop - one part at a time.
Here’s how to start:
Create a different “off switch.” Replace the after-work drink with another signal that the day is done - a workout, a shower, a walk, a different drink, a quick reset ritual.
Track the pattern. Don’t obsess. Just notice. When do you reach for a drink? What triggered it? How do you feel before and after?
Tell someone. You don’t have to announce it to the world. But talk to someone who’ll listen without judging - and who understands this cycle.
Get help breaking the pattern. Most people can’t white-knuckle their way out of daily drinking - especially when stress is high and habits are strong.
Let’s Talk — Free, Private, and No Pressure
At Reset My Future, we help high-functioning people shift out of weekday drinking - without shame, without labels, and without stepping away from life.
Whether your goal is to quit, cut back, or just stop feeling stuck, we’ll help you figure out what’s driving the pattern - and how to change it sustainably.
Book a free consultation to talk through your situation and see if our program might be right for you.
About the Author
Graeme Alford is the founder of Reset My Future and has been sober for over 40 years. Once a high-functioning alcoholic whose addiction cost him everything—including his career and freedom—Graeme rebuilt his life from the ground up. Today, he leads a one-on-one recovery program that helps people stop drinking, reset their thinking, and start living a life they’re proud of.He holds a Diploma in Alcohol, Other Drugs & Mental Health and has worked with hundreds of clients who want a real alternative to traditional rehab. His approach blends lived experience with evidence-based strategies—and a deep belief that no one is too far gone to change.
